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Doesn't this lead to an all-or-nothing approach?

I don't want randomnewssite to track me. But a favorite online store...I do want help with recommendations.

You would presumably be logged in to your favorite store site, and they would be using your identifying session to make recommendations, not anonymous tracking cookies.
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Then sign in, thats enough signal for them to track you
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Just disable cookies on your browser by default, and enable it for the sites that you need to log in to.

Ironically, this has the effect of cookie banners reappearing every time because they cannot place a cookie that says that you have rejected them.

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Just configure your browser to ask for cookies for that store only?