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I gave up, bought a kobo libra2 that never saw an internet connection (you can find updated firmware online to download) and now just borrow epubs in the soulseek library.
I hope the kobo store has rigorous screening of their books, unlike Amazon: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=47386280

These days it's hard to even get a proper book to read.

I also just brought the cheapest oldest b&w model kobo reader still on sale and put epubs on it. Haven’t even updated the OS. Just works. Sweet.
That works for the books you copy over, but those that come from Kobo will be downloaded as part of a sync that also does updates.